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Self care is not reserved for those who are suffering, rather it is a decision to live fully every day

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Therapy "aha" moment this week, brought to you by

Therapy "aha" moment this week, brought to you by boundary setting. There is a vast difference between expressing yourself and justifying yourself. There is never a time where you should have to justify your honest and authentic need to say "no".

If a relationship does not allow room for "no" at any given time, then that relationship should be examined. Being able to say no is a testament to an authentic relationship, where you can be all parts of yourself.

Check in with your body, does it feel tight and restricted or open and calm? Often our body will signal to us whether we want to say yes or no at any given time. You deserve to honor your true desire and when that boundary is expressed with compassion, a healthy relationship can become even more fulfilling.

#no#boundary#boundarysetting
#relationships #hsp #emotionalabuse #survivor #authentic #authenticity #therapy #aha #truth

I would like to introduce my handsome husband💗

I would like to introduce my handsome husband💗

A lot of the work that I do is centered around healthy relationships and he really is at the heart of all of that. Not because we are perfect but because we are imperfect. Authentic, open relationships take a great deal of work and dedication. That's why since becoming parents we have stuck to our "One Date Night a Month Rule".

As parents, and working adults, the date night goal can sometimes be a mountain to climb to make happen, yet somehow we have stuck to it. Without setting that time aside, I am quite certain our relationship would look completely different.

Dating your partner can differ for everyone, based on resources, time, and ability. Remember that a date night doesn't necessarily have to mean you leave the house. If that's not possible, there are many creative ways to have a date night in. It can be helpful to check in with your partner about what you need to sustain your connection and be intentional about doing it on a regular basis together.

I also included the fabulous song by #raylamontagne who serenaded us for our date night at the #carolinatheater. His lyrics ring true for many couples including us.

#datenight #marriage #relationshipgoals #relationships #dateyourspouse #connect #parents #handsom#durham#love #comittment

Therapy "Aha" moment today. So often we are runnin

Therapy "Aha" moment today. So often we are running away from our feelings with dissociation through substances, distractions, overworking, overproducing, and criticism.

We think the next "best thing" will make us feel better when what we really need to do is feel the thing that is hurting us. It can be painful to sit quietly and be with an emotion. Many of us think that by complaining or venting excessively about an emotion it means that we are being with it. Sometimes all we are doing is over-processing. This too is another form of dissociation.

Try instead for a moment to find where an emotion shows up in your body. Allow for that emotion to be even more intense, strong and present. Watch what happens as the emotion, ebbs and flows. Watch how the wave will finally subside after some time. Then and only then can you face down the fear of any given emotion- freeing you of the holding pattern of reject-deflect-dissociate.

#emotion #emotionregulation #therapy
#aha #selfworth #selfawareness #trauma #feelings #fear

Thank you @empowered.relationship for having me on

Thank you @empowered.relationship for having me on your podcast for this powerful episode. All too often we believe as empaths and HSPs that others deserve are indefinite compassion. This can be a very dangerous mindset as it permits potential abusers to treat us poorly because we will tend to understand where they are coming from.

Just because you know why someone is treating you the way they're treating you does not mean that gives them permission to treat you badly. You have a right to say for instance, " I know your issues lead you to act this way, but It is not my responsibility to help you fix them."

You yourself more than anyone else in the world deserves your own self-compassion- FIRST

#selfworth #selflove #hsp #compassion #boundaries #podcastlife #podcast #sensitive #empath #narcissist #emotionalabuse #empower

Another therapy "aha" moment. My clients never cea

Another therapy "aha" moment. My clients never cease to amaze me and teach me new things everyday. A client of mine was describing something she read related to this quote. If we practice self-love and are actively always trying to take care of ourselves, it is a fantastic thing! But if that is the only way we try to Love ourselves, we remain outside of ourselves. Almost like a spectator looking within.

Instead practicing the ultimate source of mindfulness and loving BEING ourselves in all that we do. Can you imagine a better form of self-love?! Loving what you are doing and who you are being in the moment is an incredible way to truly engage in what we are all trying to achieve, a loving relationship with ourselves.

Ever so grateful for my thoughtful and amazing clients 🙏🙏🙏

#aha #therapy #mindfulness #therapy #therapist #selfempowerment #selflove #love #hsp #sensitive

Using your voice is an incredibly powerful way to

Using your voice is an incredibly powerful way to combat panic, stress, and dissociation. There are so many amazing ways to do this. Singing, chanting, and in this video using the therapeutic regulation of humming with bees breath.

Remember the more you practice these things the better. You don't even need to do the full skill with the hands, just even simply humming or singing to yourself can be incredibly regulating.

As I mentioned, I even used the humming skill when getting oral surgery once. The dentist may have thought I was crazy but it certainly helped to keep me calm!

#vagusnerve #singing #humming #calm #voice #polyvagal

Therapy "aha" moment today. Sometimes being a "fi

Therapy "aha" moment today.

Sometimes being a "fixer" also means being a "controller". Trying to save those that we love from their problems is often a temporary fix and sometimes causes a rift in the relationship.

Rather, focus inward on your own emotional experience allowing you to be present in your own life. That way both you and the person that you care about have space to change, grow and evolve. And if the other person does not change, you have at least continued to work on your own journey.

#therapy #aha #selfworth #selfempowerment #selflove #compassion #empathy #codependency #letgo

Life Hacker Article is up! https://lifehacker.com

Life Hacker Article is up!

https://lifehacker.com/how-to-set-boundaries-with-your-mom-1848893283/amp

#mothersday #complex #boundary #boundaries #relationships

Today's Therapy Session "aha moment" How to set a

Today's Therapy Session "aha moment"

How to set an ultimatum and follow through with it?

1. Know your currency- decide what will happen if the other person's behavior does not change. Roleplay and practice expressing this to them.
2. Reaffirm your stance- when and if they disagree or try to manipulate, return back to your original statement like a broken record.
3. Seek accountability if needed- share your ultimatum with someone else who can keep you accountable to following through.
4- Avoid back pedalling- remind yourself that you have the right to set this expectation and boundary.

#boundary #boundaries #ultimatum #selfempowerment #therapy #aha #selfworth #selflove

Start off your week with intentional yoga movement

Start off your week with intentional yoga movement and breath-work at Blush Cowork in Cary, NC with Dr. Kelley June 6 at 5:30

1. Dr. Kelley will offer multiple modifications and use of invitational language - this is to promote a sense of empowerment, making each part of the practice completely optional and encouraging the client to choose for themselves.

2. She will invite you to shift attention to present moment experience- this can promote a connection with the body that is often disrupted as a result of trauma.

3. She'll be doing the practice with you- This is to promote a shared, authentic experience and less of a power dynamic. There will be no touch or assists in the practice.

**Attendees must bring their own mat, towel, and water bottle**

#yoga # blushcowork #namaste
#breathe #vinyasa #presentmoment #empowerment

Though gaslighting can occur in any kind of relati

Though gaslighting can occur in any kind of relationship (parent/child, boss/employee, etc.), we’re focusing here on gaslighting in romantic relationships. If you suspect your partner is gaslighting you, it’s important to be aware of common tactics and words used by gaslighters, which is why we tapped Dr. Amelia Kelley a trauma- informed therapist who’s also the co-author of What I Wish I Knew: Surviving and Thriving After an Abusive Relationship, for six common gaslighting phrases to look out for.

To find out what they are, check out the article on Yahoo News : These 6 Gaslighting Phrases Are the Markers of True Toxicity

#gaslighting #abuse #empowerment #narcissist #narcissisticabuse #yahoonews #purewow #article

I love when I come across a book that portrays eve

I love when I come across a book that portrays everything I want to share with my clients! This was such an excellent read cover to cover and I would highly recommend it for anyone dealing with toxic people, or who feel their deep empathy or sensitivity have led them to relationships with the wrong people. #toxicrelationships #read #shahidaarabi #hsp #empath #highlysensitiveperson #narcissisticabuse #narcissist #psychoeducation #therapy#selfhelp

"QUOTE FROM TODAY'S SESSION" I'm always honored an

"QUOTE FROM TODAY'S SESSION" I'm always honored and amazed by some of the amazing insight, creativity, and aha moments that happen in therapy. #therapy #happyplace #spillthetea #selfempowerment #selfesteem #dontcarewhatpeoplethink #dontcare #selflove #compassion #tea

If you ever find yourself struggling with addictio

If you ever find yourself struggling with addiction, embarrassment, constant negative self-talk, self-sabotage, or the fear of failure and perfectionism, then shame is most likely running your life. The thing about shame is that it needs SECRECY in order to live on. Shame has no power when it is communicated and shared.

Most people who relapse or struggle with addiction or remain in dangerous relationships do so in secrecy. "Telling on ourselves" is a powerful way to find a greater sense of strength, courage, resilience and self-esteem.✊

#shame #shameresilience #failforward #empowerment #selfesteem #courage #thriving #selfworth #selflove

“People who struggle with emotional permanence o

“People who struggle with emotional permanence often experienced unstable relationships in their past that can lead to insecurity and a fear of abandonment,” says Amelia Kelley, PhD, a relationship therapist. Want to learn more? Read on at the link 👇

https://linktr.ee/drameliakelley?utm_source=linktree_profile_share&ltsid=fb3c03f6-e2bc-4c51-8d9c-eb10cec65acd

#emotionalimpermanence #attachmentstyles #dbt #love #relationshipgoals #relationships #articles #secureattachment #healthyrelationships #emotionalpermanence

Great reminder 👏 #selfcare #empower #mentalheal

Great reminder 👏 #selfcare #empower #mentalhealth #wellness

Want to learn more about this important self-empow

Want to learn more about this important self-empowerment tool? Check out my Q&A highlights to learn how Emotional Individuation shapes our relationships. #emotionalindividuation #selfempowerment #agreetodisagree #selfcare #individuality #empoweringwomen #selflove

I had a great time on The Learn to Love Podcast w

I had a great time on The Learn to Love Podcast with @zachbeachlove talking about recognizing emotional abuse, click here to listen:

https://www.the-heart-center.com/ep-92-recognizing-emotional-abuse-with-dr-amelia-kelley/

#emotionalabuse #podcast #whatiwishiknewthebook #surviving #thriving #love

I joined Kate Anthony on her podcast this week! W

I joined Kate Anthony on her podcast this week! We discuss what being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) means, strategies for self-care, and how being an HSP can affect relationships. If you identify as an HSP, think you are one or are married to someone who is - this episode is a must-listen.

https://kateanthony.com/podcast/are-you-a-highly-sensitive-person-with-dr-amelia-kelley

@thedivorcesurvivalguide

In this “Q&A with Dr.K” I want to answer a que

In this “Q&A with Dr.K” I want to answer a question from a fellow reader and follower who asks about why their skin feels over-sensitive after/during trauma. Just like all the other organs in our body, it is sensitive to change within our body and environment.

#skin #body #stress #soothe #sootheskin #soothing #peace #calm #stressfree #safeplace #safe #skincare #trauma

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