What I Wish I Knew
Posted on December 11th, 2021
Whether you are a survivor of domestic violence, or in a relationship wrought with intimidation, gaslighting or control of any kind, it’s time to regain the part of yourself that you may have lost and find your support network to regain living your true authentic life. In What I Wish I Knew: Surviving and Thriving After an Abusive Relationship written by co-author Dr. Amelia Kelley and survivor Kendall Ann Combs, the authors use the journey of Ms. Combs’ tragic relationship experience along with Dr. Kelley’s trauma-informed, psychotherapist techniques and real strategies to support women and men who have experienced toxic, unhealthy, abusive relationships. Dr. Kelley’s whole health approach to healing and self-care is critical for those suffering from violence and other forms of relationship abuse. She shares eye-opening anecdotes, cutting-edge research, facts, and intimate wisdom in this much needed, gripping guide.
The statistics of physical abuse in relationships are still astounding as 1 in 3 women have been abused by an intimate partner in their lifetime according to the United States Center for Disease Control and Prevention. However, emotional abuse is almost equal for both genders, with close to half of both having experienced at least one form of psychological aggression by an intimate partner (which can include gaslighting, coercive control, being insulted, humiliated, or acted upon in a dangerous manner). CDC/2018* In addition, COVID 19 exacerbated alarming statistics regarding domestic violence and emotional abuse in the U.S. (NIH**).
What I Wish I Knew is part memoir by Ms. Combs about her former relationship, and part therapy and advice by Dr. Kelley who has worked with abuse survivors for over fifteen years. Throughout her career, Dr. Kelley has focused her research and training on serving those recovering from trauma, resulting in attachment and relationship issues. The book provides resources for those trying to break the cycle of abuse as well as recognize when your relationship is unhealthy and maybe even dangerous. Additionally,What I Wish I Knewcan serve as a resource for those in helping professions, or for loved ones supporting someone in an abusive relationship.
In the new age of #MeToo and Time’s Up, women have become emboldened to speak up about what they really want in consensual relationships. Dr. Kelley gives advice on how to stop people pleasing and let go of self-doubt to finally find the fulfilling relationship you desire and deserve no matter where you are in your life journey – Gen Z, Millennial, Gen Xer, or Boomer.
— Dr. Kelley